


No Character Death, Please?  Kthanks.

by brainofck



Category: Stargate SG-1
Genre: Bad Sex, M/M, Quarantine
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-08-07
Updated: 2011-08-07
Packaged: 2017-10-22 08:26:53
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 737
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/236095
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brainofck/pseuds/brainofck
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Off world sex, awkwardness at home.</p>
            </blockquote>





	No Character Death, Please?  Kthanks.

**Author's Note:**

  * For [zats_clear](https://archiveofourown.org/users/zats_clear/gifts).



> For my dearest Zats Clear, who requested as follows:
> 
>  _J/D, quarantined off-world, UST/flirting to first time, awkward-not-mindbendingly-awesome sex, bring them home to be awkward in the SGC. (keep in mind, I may request a part 2 on this someday to see what happens after you've tortured them with bad sex and left them embarrassed in the SGC)_
> 
>  _No Character Death, plskthnks?_
> 
> 


_Day 1_

Actually, Day 1 was four days ago, but I'm so bored, I'm starting a diary. See. That bored.

Day 1 was the day the SGC called to say they're under quarantine, they don't know what it is, they don't know when it started, they don't know who's got it, so everybody off world find a nice hidey hole, batten down the hatches, and stay put til further notice.

All I can say is, this one better not be fatal. No character death, plz? K,thnks.

Day 2 was the day we found the nice dry cave on the hill overlooking the gate. Cleared out a dead hornets' nest, some old scat, and started laying in the firewood. It gets damned cold here at night.

Day 3 was the day Daniel started to be effected by the virus, because he put his sleeping bag _right next_ to mine, like there wasn't a whole entire cave to put it in, including a really great spot on the other side of the fire that I deliberately left for him to take because I'm a gentleman like that when I'm camping. AND he used it the first night.

Which leads us to

 _Day 4_

Bored because this planet is totally safe and nobody's here except maybe a bear or something because exploring a little farther back into the hills I found another cave with REALLY HUGE piles of crap in it. But otherwise, totally bored. Except last night, when Daniel, clearly under the effects of whatever this virus thing is, sorta cuddled up to me. And I'd think it was just because it's really damned cold here at night, except he was on the side toward the fire and plus he started doing stuff with the zippers on the sleeping bag, which I'm pretty sure you can't do by accident while actually sleeping.

Then he was less with the cuddling, so much, more with the sleeping on me.

Did I mention that he got naked before he bedded down for the night?

Except he put on dry socks. What a camper.

So actually, bored and horney now. I suspect I am also experiencing symptoms, since Daniel never made me feel horney before, even that time in the showers when he claimed he lost his contact and he spent 15 minutes crawling around on the floor trying to find it.

Naked.

With the water still running.

And I watched the whole time and totally didn't get a hard on. Not at all.

You do realize Daniel doesn't wear contacts, right?

OK. Totally burning this page now.

 _Day 5_

He kissed me when we woke up this morning. Ew. Morning breath.

 _Day 6_

Morning breath aside, I liked it.

 _Day 7_

Can't keep this journal up much longer. Only so much paper available, and Daniel keeps glaring at me every time I burn a page.

Anyway, Dear Diary, today I screwed my best buddy.

He was back at the dig site, since we don't have anything better to do, and he was crawling around there in the dirt, and his ass looked so good…

So I jumped him.

We got our pants sort of half off, and I shoved my dick between his legs and up against his balls, and he made this _whimpering_ noise, and shot almost right away, which completely freaked me out and I was just pulling off then _I_ shot, just like that, all over his pants. Like a chicken shit, I just got the hell out of there. Now he's not talking to me. He moved his sleeping bag, too.

 _Day 8_

Home again. No point in writing this. Doing it on the word processor and gonna close without saving.

I'd like to blame the quarantine thing. But Doc Fraiser says it was a stomach virus to end all stomach viruses. When I asked her if it made people act weird, she said, "No, why?" and Daniel just looked at me like I was something he scraped off his boot on the llama planet.

I want to apologize, but I'm not sure exactly what to say, or even what to apologize for, so I'm just gonna try to hit the showers before Danny tonight and head home.

Deleting now. Maybe I need one of those journal things like Cassie is always writing in about her boyfriends and school problems. Because clearly I am a 16-year-old girl.


End file.
